obsession, broken down

Rag & Bone spring/summer 2011, shot by Gianni Pucci for Style.com

A top I had been admiring has been slashed to near-bargain levels in the Net-a-Porter sale, and for the past two days I have been resisting buying it, because of the desire to just enjoy the clothes in my wardrobe, and I really don't want more stuff.

I came dangerously close to caving in several times. Internet shopping is evil like that, you can do it any time you are in front of the computer, with minimal physical effort and no friend nearby to restrain you. I had made what I consider level-headed arguments each time talking myself out of it, but the siren call always came back.

I finally shook free of the obsession when I realised what kept coming back to haunt me - that I would regret not buying it. I've had these moments when I felt despair over a missed opportunity -a certain pair of flats, a bag. I know this isn't a groundbreaking revelation, but I hadn't realised I was among those who felt this way about stuff.

I guess I won't know for sure if I will regret giving up on the top, but when I got down to thinking about it, for every one thing I sorely regret not buying, there usually about fifty others I forgot without a second thought. So probability is on my side, and let's face it, something new will come along to haunt my mind and test my will again.

Picture from style.com


Nhu said…
It's true about probability being on your side. I find that the ratio between items I regret getting and items I regret not getting are heavily weighted to the former. But you always remember the one that got away!
S said…
I admire you resolve, I often cave to my obsessions. But you're absolutely right, "the one that got away" are few and far between. I wish that type of rational thought could save me from my obsessions, but I suppose there's nothing rational about obsessions in the first place. The shot of the Rag & Bone sweater is so stunning, btw
Stephanie said…
It's such a tricky balance between appreciating the clothes you already have, and allowing yourself the enjoyment of having something new. I think that if you're judicious about what you add to your wardrobe, you shouldn't have to restrain yourself from buying something you love. That said, I agree that there are very few things I'd turn back the retail clock for!
son said…
really nicely put, it's a familiar feeling. now that im much more careful with purchases, it feels just as bad to realise the purchase was an error as it is to miss out on a coveted item. that said, watching items sell out from my nap wishlist made me realise that most of the time it was a just fleeting desire, and something new would catch my eye.
yanqin said…
Quinn: I do, I still miss a pair of Miu Miu low-heel pumps - haven't seen anything like it since...

S: I love the sweater, I'm still checking it out...haha. It's only the thought of how quickly I get over something once I own it that keeps me in check - I don't like that feeling of knowing I caved in to novelty.

Stephanie: I agree about being judicious, but I haven't been as judicious as I would have liked to be this year - like buying a dress in January that I've only worn once!

son: Often I'm relieved something sells out before I caved in, haha. It takes the decision off my hands.
Anonymous said…
I think it's very wise of you to write a post about your obsession. Perhaps if I made a cathartic public confession like you did, I wouldn't let my obsession get the better of me! I have wasted so much money on compulsive purchases the past 2 years. They have all been given away or sold now and I don't even remember most of them. Only now that I've learned my lesson, but sometimes the temptation can take over.

So kudos to you for holding your ground. If I had your self-control, I would probably own a car by now!
yanqin said…
Anon: I have to admit, it felt good to type away and organise my thoughts - I had made up my mind but writing it down strengthens that resolve.
Jennifer said…
I think I enjoy the haunting/obsessing/admiring almost as much as I do owning something. And obsessing is free. ;)

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