the message
I took this picture last month, but I didn't have a post in mind.
Then I came across this post on Put This On, and it struck me because it put a finger what I've been finding amusing when I read menswear magazines, blogs etc:
"I’ve lamented to friends that people care too much about the authenticity of their clothes, but don’t demand the same authenticity in people. There are people who dress like international men of leisure, but they’ve never travelled outside of the country; people who dress like they come from elite universities, but aren’t terribly well read; people who dress like early 20th-century factory workers, but … live in 2011. "
Obviously, it's not that only a lumberjack can wear a plaid shirt, but personally, I hope that whenever I meet people, their clothes aren't mere costume. You want to know people who dress like they live - that's authentic, honest, confident, and inspiring.
There are different motivations behind people dressing the way they do - they dress like the person they dream of being, they dress to fit in, etc - but whatever it is, I think the ones we admire are those who have more than just the right props.
I think I am drawn to simple, non-statement clothing and styles, because I feel fake in anything else. Sure, I have my influences, but I don't feel like they show up in how I dress. And as much as possible, I never want to give anyone the impression I'm something that I'm not.
Thoughts on that Put This On post? And what do you want your clothes to say?
*EDIT: Thanks everyone who commented, from your comments I realise how judge-y I sounded and probably a little belittling as well, which was unintentional and should have been better explained. I'm not against aspirational and inspired dressing, just against the shallow pursuit of solely a "look". I think we have all come across extreme cases like that and that's what I find distasteful. But of course it's fine to wear a hunting jacket even if you don't hunt. I'd love a pair of riding boots, and I only ride bicycles.
Comments
This year I have been working on making my wardrobe more casual because, yes, that is my life. I have a tendency to overdress and while I do want to be dressed well it is also important for me to be dressed appropriately for my life of kid activities, running errands and general mom-ness.
I will still put on a dress and tights but now I will also throw a hoodie over it. Something to add that element of casual which (hopefully) prevents me from looking like the mom who is trying too hard.
i've never ridden a motorcycle, though i just got a pair of dreamy wishlist biker boots. oh well, they'll become part of my uniform soon enough anyway!
Love your blog, btw. You always have such interesting things to say.
if writes are only capable of writing about the places they've been to, the life they themselves have lead, the characters and personal traits they carry on themselves, etc, well, there's big danger in that. they can be very limited thus narrow in their perspectives. i personally don't think dressing is any form of creative art, but to someone else, it can be.
these days, am not sure why clothes we wear have to correlate with our lifestyles - in his case im sure it only refers to city life.
theres also the inverse snobbery - when someone who went to the good college etc wears the tweed jacket, college jumper etc etc just to make the point. thats as agitating in its own way.
what i find more disturbing is when stylistic choices make up for being vapid, uninteresting, myopic etc. surely ultimately the person behind the clothing is the final test.
basically your point about not just having the right props! nice post, as always.
Pret a Porter: I have the same feeling everytime I see Kate Middleton in McQueen! If there wasn't a caption to tell me it's McQueen, I would have never guessed.
And I think really shot myself in the foot with this one - dressing like people who inspire us or in an aspirational way is great, I did not mean to sound like we should all dress according to some kind of "station" or category! I just meant that it can't be the shallow pursuit of just a look.
stacie: Whenever I feel like I "should" be wearing something, I stop myself and just wear the thing I actually really really want to wear. Personally, for me, the fantasy idea of how I'd like to dress always loses, haha.
miss sophie: I agree about instinct - and I think that always come across in people in the sense that they look confident, and not "pose-y".
Ooh, those boots, can't wait to see them. I have a biker-ish jacket and I can't ride a bike either....
chic_e: I agree, we have to try a look and idea to know whether it suits us. I think the examples in the Put This On pose are probably more extreme cases where people get a bit too caught up with having the right look, and cross a line into the "silly" zone.
joy: I think a bit of fantasy and pretend is part of getting dressed, even in the everyday sense, I just find it a bit much when it gets taken to a extreme level and it's solely about the look. I can't explain it but it depresses me.
Unknown: Your comment made me see the quote in a different light and I think you're right - it can seem judgmental and elitist, like it's putting down people's dreams. That's not what I intended at all though...I was imagining the poseurs I've met who work a look but in fact it's just a look to them and it just feels hollow and vain and ironically, even though they've painstakingly put it together, it's uninspiring. I
Lindsay: I agree with you. I wish I'd made myself clearer!
luka: ""the desire built on vanity" and the "desire derived from genuine feeling/aspiration/inspiration" -- you're right in that you can tell between the two, and it's the former I find so depressing.
son: About how we dress co-relating with our lifestyles, that's just a personal preference of mine, so I did not mean to impose that on people.
And you're right about inverse snobbery - I think it's like what Luka said about vanity; it's vanity versus authenticity and it;s the former I find distasteful.
You have chosen a simple, unassuming style? - that's completely fine with me and with the vast majority of people. But if you try to impose this simple unassuming (in my opinion - slightly "blah") style to everybody else, - that's another question.
Some people dress just to cover themselves and not to feel cold. Some try to express themselves through their clothes. Are you sure you know their personality well enough to tell them if they have expressed themselves "correctly" or not?
Kate: My workplace is casual so my working and non working clothes have blurred together haha. I think I don't know how to dress for escapism, it's just not how I express myself but I think that ability switch around and still somehow stay yourself is pretty impressive.
Anon (5.49): I haven't at any point in my post told anyone how to dress, or imposed my style on other people. Maybe when you correct that impression we can have a real debate.
I think there is a harmony and ease when our style and clothes reflect the lifestyle that we really lead. When I decluttered my wardrobe, the many things that left were clothes that were overly loud and fussy, items bearing too much logo, anything too formal and restrictive. I am after all working in a casual environment. Simple cotton dresses (plain or in quiet prints) work for me, flats work for me and they reflect the fact that I like simple clothes with a quirky or feminine touch.
But there was a time when I was more experimental with style and wore crazy things like leather,boots and fur in Singapore! I feel like a phony when I see old pics of myself!
Now, I clearly differentiate what's me and what's for fun. There are special days where I will want to have fun with fashion and try crazy stuff...haha.. and I'd be sure it shows up in what I wear. But most of the time, people will recognise me by the clothes I wear.
Like most people, I celebrate diversity and seriously feel that as long as they are comfortable, it really doesn't bother me too much. I'll just take it as eye candy!
I do not mind when someone dresses in costume, head to toe, as anything they wish to. I don't think it's faux anything. They find this look or reference appealing and embrace it. It's a pleasure for me to enjoy that effort. If people want to create a narrative for themselves through clothing, I think that is wonderful. A Sid Vicious punk, an Amish woman, it's all good. Lynn Yaeger is infamous for pulling her inspiration from dolls and turn-of-the-century French orphans (talk about romanticing!), and clearly she is neither, yet no one would accuse her lacking individuality.
Oh, I just saw your edit and didn't think you were being judge-y at all. You were expressing an opinion and a preference and it made me think about the topic. I enjoyed this post.
chuck: I agree with that philosophy, but as I said, to each their own.
editor: "'ve had people sum up my "look" and what they see is not necessarily what I am intending to project. I find that interesting." -- so do I.
I think what sets people like Lynn Yaeger apart or Daphne Guinness is their genuine interest behind the costumes they adopt, it feels like they are interested in more than a look. At least, that's the vibe I get from them.